Originally posted on what was known as the Humans of Calgary Facebook page. You can now read the original post on the Humans of LDS Facebook page.
I woke up and tears streamed down my face. No thoughts crossed my mind, I did not have to hear anything, see anything. I woke up and I just felt sad. Never before and never again have I experienced that. Automatic, heart clenching sorrow.
After all this time, it feels pretty silly to say it all happened because of a boy. My third boyfriend, but my first love. It feels even sillier to say I met him my freshman year of college. We had only dated a few months when he told me he would be leaving the states, halfway through the school year, to return back home to England. The following morning is when I arose and my body’s first natural instinct was to cry.
We tried to make it work long distance. I tried.
Although we had some different standards and he did not belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, we tried. I tried. Months consisted of hope rising up just to get smashed down repeatedly over and over. It felt like voices of my loved ones surrounded me, telling me I deserved better. Even my best friend, who is not a member of the Church either, insisted I move on.
For the April 2018 Semi-Annual General Conference, my soccer coach invited all the members on the team to watch. I layed on the carpet in front of everyone, in an attempt to conceal my emotions. Through each talk, I either slept or silently slipped my tears away.
Everything built up to an entire mess and I knew that I would have to let him go. I just did not want to.
But thank goodness for my mom. Wisely, she called me after the conference and asked me a simple question, “What do you think about going on your mission when you turn nineteen (in July), instead of waiting?”
Silence.
Peace.
The Holy Ghost confirmed the truth to me: I should not wait until January 2019, but I needed to leave that July 2018. Like usual, when something is right, everything else fell into place. My coach agreed to hold my spot for when I returned, my papers were filled out rather quickly, and I received my call and report date all within a couple of months.
The lesson I learned has been reconfirmed continuously through my mission: the importance of eternal families.
I could create and fall in love with anyone for this life, but I do not want to. What I desire is much greater than that. I want to create a relationship with someone I can stay with forever, not just until “death do you part.”
I want my children to have that blessing as well, something I never really experienced.
I know from the families I have seen, the experiences my family had, and the things I went through, that eternal families are of the utmost importance. They are a precious gift from God and a great part of His plan…because when we can help our families come unto Christ and actually build a foundation on Him, they cannot fall. They cannot fail.
And we can live together forever.
I say these things in the name of the Son, Jesus Christ, Amen.
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